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Monday, 12 September 2022 08:04

How to understand whether it is worth getting divorced or not?

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Spouses who have lived together for many years face crises and problems in marriage. But not all of them end in divorce. As reported by the resource https://divorcescience.org/ the most common situations when a couple has long been ready for a divorce include:

  • Indifference - in communication with such couples, coldness and lack of interest in each other are striking. Even psychologists do not want to communicate with such couples, because they simply share living space;
  • The presence of humiliation or insults - most often, women face such a problem. Men can behave aggressively, morally pressure, humiliate and insult, pointing out the shortcomings of the spouse;
  • Living for the sake of children – many couples make the unreasonable decision to live together for the sake of children. In this way, they delay the moment of divorce;
  • Lack of love and respect – Couples who have lived together for years can get bored with each other. Everyday life, family problems, troubles at work - all this can put pressure morally, which is why difficulties arise in a married couple;
  • There is no fidelity – if one of the spouses systematically cheats, this is an important step towards divorce;
  • Constant swearing and arguing – spouses often swear and argue for the same reasons, and do not find a solution to their problems. Conflict situations put pressure morally, which is why there is no interest in communicating and living with a partner;
  • Fear of a new life – often women are afraid of divorce, guided by the fear of a new life. Women are afraid that they will not cope without a man, which is why they tolerate them.

A common cause of divorces faced by married couples is a glitch in their emotional background. It arises due to various situations: constant littering, disputes, conflicts, nitpicking, the presence of insults or humiliations.

How to survive a divorce? Advice of psychologists

The topic of divorce is quite complicated. Surviving this difficult period is not easy, so psychologists give such advice:

  • Communicate more - do not withdraw into yourself, be afraid to voice your emotions and experiences. It is recommended to communicate more with people: friends, relatives, work colleagues;
  • Release all negative emotions - it is recommended to transform negativity into energy and splash it out with minimal damage, both for yourself and others. To do this, you can scream, beat the dishes, engage in an aggressive sport;
  • Find the positive sides – it is recommended to find positive traits in a divorce. For example, now you do not have to coordinate your plans, consult and you can go on a long-awaited vacation and not adapt to the second half;
  • Take care of yourself - after a divorce, you can change your style, update your wardrobe, change your hairstyle, go to the gym, have a massage and do other procedures for which the marriage did not have enough time;
  • Plan your day - in order not to plunge into experiences, memories and fear, you need to fully plan your day. To do this, you can buy a diary, in which to write down all your activities and affairs by the hour.

Immediately after the divorce, psychologists advise not to rush into search of a new partner. The choice of a new partner will not be dictated by common sense, but by the desire to take revenge and demonstrate their importance. The opportunity to build a new relationship will appear only after going through all the stages of experience and solving internal problems.

Is it possible to live a happy life alone?

Some people who have gone through the divorce stage do not remain single for many years. Often, this is due not to the fact that a person cannot find a partner, but to his reluctance to enter into a new relationship. Perhaps this is due to a bad experience or fear. Such people often have pets and feel absolutely happy.

People who live happily alone and do not seek to find a couple claim that they like solitude and independence. They should not consult, adjust their plans to another person and can spend their time according to their own interests, plan rest and leisure. Thus, living alone is quite real and can be happy.